<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Our New Normal by TheWednesdayProject</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/30148287">Our New Normal</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheWednesdayProject/pseuds/TheWednesdayProject'>TheWednesdayProject</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Glee</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst and Romance, F/F, M/M, Mild Language, Same-Sex Marriage</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 18:54:53</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>18,046</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/30148287</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheWednesdayProject/pseuds/TheWednesdayProject</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Santana Lopez and Brittany S. Pierce have been happily married for the past five years and are currently living in New York City, but their bond with one another is about to be tested during what should be one of the most exciting times of their lives together.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Blaine Anderson/Kurt Hummel, Rachel Berry/Jesse St. James, Santana Lopez/Brittany S. Pierce</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>22</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I do not own any of the characters depicted in this story. I merely borrow them from Glee. The stories and situations I create are a work of my imagination and I do not ascribe them to official story canon.</p><p>I currently do not have a beta and do not wish for one at this time. All mistakes are my own.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>early November, 2025</b>
</p><p>Brittany carefully hurried down the bottom of the staircase, tightly gripping the sturdy rail with each step, and headed toward the kitchen where the smell of her mother-in-law preparing dinner tickled her nose. She walked into the spacious room, quietly announced her entrance with a soft hello, and Maribel Lopez took one look at the young woman's face before sprinting into action. She turned the stove off immediately, proceeded to set a few dishes down into the sink, and turned to give her daughter-in-law her full attention.</p><p>"Okay, sweetheart. Just take a seat right here," Maribel suggested, assisting Brittany comfortably down onto the rustic dining room chair in the middle of the room, placing a small pillow behind her lower back for support. "I will get Santana on the phone. Try to relax yourself a little and stay calm.”</p><p>Brittany closed her eyes tightly, tucked her long, wavy blonde locks behind her ears, and clasped her hands together as the pain intensified. She began to take deep breaths, inhaling and exhaling slowly; counting aloud from one to ten and back down again. She watched out of the corner of her eye as Maribel nervously fumbled with her mobile phone as she lifted it from the kitchen counter and dialed Santana's number.</p><p>The tension in the room was beginning to coat the air thickly. Maribel mumbled incoherently to herself as she began to pace back and forth in the kitchen, the seconds ticking by quickly without an answer from her daughter. "Come on, Santana, pick up your phone..."</p><p>Brittany, with her eyes still tightly closed, began to shake her wrists and hands with anticipation; the pain increased to waves of cramping agony that left her gasping for breath. She opened her eyes and looked over at Maribel who was now impatiently tapping her foot against the limestone flooring, the sound of her shoes clicking against the tiles creating a smooth rhythm in the otherwise silent house.</p><p>"Why isn't she answering?" Brittany asked, a desperate tone accompanying her trembling voice. "She knows that I want her to have her phone on her at all times, especially when she's out of the house!"</p><p>She was on the verge of tears, both the pain she was experiencing and the irrational worry of the moment innocently overtaking her emotions. She dropped her head in her hands as she propped her elbows on the table, releasing a loud sigh from her throat. </p><p>"Give her time, Brittany. She will pick up," Maribel assured her, attempting in vain to keep the atmosphere relaxed. She took a quick glance at the screen to ensure that she was still connected, and it was then clear that Santana simply wasn't going to answer her phone.</p><p>"We have a bit of time, dear," Maribel said soothingly, walking over to Brittany and softly resting her hand on her upper back. "Maybe she is already on her way back home. Why don't you just stay down here with me until she returns. Do you want something to drink? Would you like a bottle of water? I could even make you a cup of that peppermint tea you girls like so much."</p><p>"I really don't want to sit around here and wait," Brittany replied nervously, her hands now flapping with anticipation. She looked at Maribel with pleading eyes while trying to offer her a genuine smile. Maribel knew in her head that rushing was unnecessary, but she knew in her heart that she wanted to ease Brittany's fears.</p><p>"Alright, alright," Maribel began. "We can head out. I'll try to call her again on our way. Let's get you to the car."</p><p>Maribel ended the call and tucked the phone into her back pocket, assisting Brittany to rise up out of the chair and continued, "Take it slow and focus on your breathing. We are in no major rush just yet."</p><p>Maribel's phone promptly began to ring and Brittany eagerly motioned for her to answer it as she eased back down into the chair below her.</p><p>"Santana," Maribel began, quickly placing the phone against her ear.</p><p>"I was drying my hair and didn't hear the phone ring," Santana offered immediately, interrupting before her mother could continue speaking. "Is everything okay?"</p><p>Santana tucked her phone between her ear and shoulder as she began frantically fumbling through her purse searching for her car keys. She had a strong gut feeling she knew exactly why her mother was calling.</p><p>"Everything is just fine," her mother answered, smiling genuinely as she glanced over at Brittany. "But we are about to head on over to the hospital. You're probably better off meeting us there."</p><p>"Yeah, of course. I was finishing up here anyway, so I'll just grab my stuff and head out," Santana responded. "Our gym is actually pretty close to the hospital. It'll be most likely that I'll get there first. I can wait for y'all by the main entrance," she added, grabbing her large, black gym bag and casually tossing it over her shoulder as she headed for the exit. "Can I talk to Brittany for a sec? Is she up for it?"</p><p>Maribel passed the phone to Brittany who took it and put it against her ear. Santana didn't need Brittany to say anything; she was listening intently.</p><p>"Hey you," Santana began, her voice tender and soft. "I'm going to head out to the hospital now and will meet you both there. I'll call your mom as soon as I get in the car," she added, walking out of the gym exit with urgency. "Don’t worry about anything but yourself right now. I will take care of everything else," she continued.</p><p>"Santana, I'm really scared," Brittany replied, her voice cracking.</p><p>"What are you scared of?" Santana asked tenderly. "That this will go down as one of the most awesome day of our lives? It's absolutely okay to be scared. I'm scared, too, but it's a good kind of scared, you know? Look, Britt, I won't leave your side if you don't want me to. We are in this together, now and forever. If you need me with you, I'm there. They will have to take me out kicking and screaming," she added. "But I will also respect your wish for space if that's what you prefer."</p><p>"Our lives are about to completely change, again, and I just want to be sure that we can—"</p><p>"Stop," Santana begged, interrupting her. "Stop doubting yourself. Stop doubting us. You know you are ready for this, that <em>we</em> are ready for this, and that this experience will be amazing and wild and everything we've ever wanted. We will just need to take each day as they come."</p><p>"I know all of this, and I do believe in us, Santana, but I'm scared. Really, <em>really</em> scared."</p>
<hr/><p>Quinn and Mercedes linked their arms together and walked toward the waiting room at Mercy Health Medical Center in the buzzing city center of Lima, where many of Santana and Brittany's family and friends were eagerly waiting. Once the two of them arrived where everyone was quietly gathered, Quinn glanced over at Mercedes who nodded her head for Quinn to begin talking. Everyone looked up at them in anticipation.</p><p>"They asked us to leave her room," Quinn announced, smiling widely, as she clasped her hands together. "They don't want Brittany to have any further guests at the moment. Her blood pressure has been rising a little and they want her to rest as much as possible."</p><p>Friends and family who could slowly make their way to the hospital were there. Santana had spent most of her time calling or texting every single contact in her mobile phone. She wanted Brittany to have the support of the entire world if she could offer it. Many of their guests had slowly trickled in throughout the night and into the early morning hours, and even more were expected in the coming days.</p><p>Tina and Sugar sat next to one another, both of them having already shed tears aplenty, used tissues clutched firmly in their hands. Rachel stood next to the wall leaning on it for support, extra large coffee from <em>The Lima Bean</em> in her hand, still exhausted after the overnight train ride from Manhattan with her husband, Jesse. Sam, Blaine and Kurt stood silently, but supportively, behind Maribel and Whitney, Brittany's mother, who was nervously fanning herself with a hospital brochure. Blair, Brittany's younger half-sister, was seated next to Whitney.</p><p>"But Brittany is doing well. The baby could be arriving any minute," Mercedes beamed. All of the guests looked around at one another and smiled.</p><p>"Mrs. Pierce, Santana said you could be in the room if you want to," Mercedes offered. "She feels like this is a time that a daughter really needs her mother by her side."</p><p>"No, no," Mrs. Pierce replied. "Brittany made it very clear to me that she doesn't want that. She told me that I just stress her out. She asked me to sit out here and babysit her father because he's going to be a nervous wreck."</p><p>"Besides," Maribel continued. "They only want one additional person in the room with her during the actual birth, and since Whitney and I can't join them together, we agreed that it's best when it's just Santana." Whitney glanced at Maribel and both women smiled at one another.</p><p>"Where is Mr. Pierce anyway?" Blaine asked, his eyebrows raising curiously, as everyone began looking around realizing that he was nowhere to be seen.</p>
<hr/><p>Brittany and Santana had been at the hospital for nearly 15 hours, her contractions slowly increasing in frequency and intensity, as they awaited the birth of their first child. Brittany had spent most of her time lying in different positions trying to encourage the baby to move around, accompanied Whitney and Blair on a walk in a nearby park on hospital grounds, listened to relaxing music — mostly piano ballads — as Santana tried to soothe her tired body with endless shoulder and foot massages, read aloud a few children's books, and practiced breathing techniques throughout the day with the doctor and various nurses.</p><p>Brittany's hospital room was already brightly decorated with half a dozen vases of flowers and several cards displayed proudly along the windowsill. Several gifts, unopened, were stacked on a small table in the corner of the room. Unopened wine bottles and individually wrapped cigars awaited guests. A few large balloons that were tied to the back of a chair swayed proudly in the space above them.</p><p>"My excitement for this baby is slowly waning," Brittany chuckled from her hospital bed, exhaustion slowly taking over what strength she had remaining. The pain had intensified within the last three hours, but Brittany continued to refuse any offer of an epidural. She had discussed with the doctor and Santana beforehand that she wanted to try to have the baby naturally.</p><p>"I’m really, really proud of you," Santana beamed, seating herself at the foot of the hospital bed, resting her hand on top of Brittany's leg that was tucked underneath a blanket. "I know we don’t really know where things are headed for us, but I'm trying my best to stay in the moment and enjoy all of this. And I think I'm doing a pretty damn good job. She paused for a moment then continued, "It has been amazing to be around you again, Britt. My heart feels whole again."</p><p>"Thank you so much for being there for me," Brittany softly answered, her bright smile quickly appearing to take on the form of a frown. She covertly wiped the corners of her eyes as tears formed. "I mean, I know you were never <em>not</em> going to be there for me, but it's just been a really good few weeks being around you. You know, like it used to be."</p><p>"Yeah, I know what you mean," Santana replied, her eyes darting down toward the floor and then back up to Brittany again. "I can't even describe how special it has been having you back in my life a little bit. I've missed you more than I could ever express."</p><p>Silence cushioned itself uncomfortably between them. They both looked up and smiled at one another, seemingly forgetting any troubles between them.</p><p>"You’re going to be the mother of my baby. We are finally going to be parents," Santana continued, her quick attempt at slicing into the silence. "Crazy, isn't it? Brittany S. Pierce is going to be my baby mama. Who could have ever imagined that?” she added, grinning, as the dimples on her cheeks danced to the surface. Her voice then weakened, but took on a firm tone. "And I’m going to do everything in my power to win you back. I'm not done fighting for you. For us. I'm going to do everything in my power to prove that I still deserve you. You're still my wife, and I don't want that to change."</p><p>"That I am," Brittany said charmingly, a half-smile adorning her face.</p><p>"Can I kiss you?" Santana asked nervously, her eyes darting to the floor again. She could feel Brittany's eye burning through her anyway.</p><p>"Santana..." Brittany sighed. </p><p>A nurse then walked into the room carrying <em>yet another</em> vase of flowers before continuing loudly, "I'm so sorry Mrs. Lopez-Pierce, but we still want to limit the number of guests that are coming through. These beautiful flowers are from..." she continued as she took a moment to glance down at the names she had written down on a small piece of paper and continued, "Artie and Kitty. They just arrived and send their love."</p>
<hr/><p>Brittany's obstetrician, Dr. Patton, a tall, petite woman with waist length brown hair that she always kept neatly braided low behind her head, spent the next thirty minutes preparing Brittany and Santana for active labor. The journey was seemingly nearing the end - and quickly. Brittany's water had broken an hour before, and both girls were nervous with anticipation. The nurses began to shuffle around the room, checking monitors and machines near Brittany's bed, each one popping off a repetitive sound that kept the room alert and active. Everyone seemed to be increasing the pace of their work. It appeared the final act was nearly upon them.</p><p>"Just take a deep breath. I'm going to stay right by your side," Santana said reassuringly as she took Brittany's hand in hers, tears welling in the corner of her own eyes now. 'I'm not going anywhere. We are going to do this together."</p><p>Brittany squeezed Santana's hand harder as pain rippled through her abdomen, the grip so tight that her knuckles looked like they were going to break out of her pale skin. She couldn't say anything, but looked back at her lovingly.</p><p>"You’ve done so well already. You're the strongest woman I know," Santana continued. The pain was only intensifying and Brittany was clearly becoming agitated.</p><p>"I am so happy that—"</p><p>"Just <em>shut up</em>, Santana!" Brittany shrieked, her voice echoing loudly throughout the room. "Oh my God, I’m so sorry," she immediately added, giving Santana an apologetic pout. Santana let out an understanding chuckle. "You’re just talking way too much right now and sucking out all of my energy. I'm going to need it to try and teleport this baby out of my lady cave."</p><p>A nurse came over and introduced herself, having just arrived for her shift, and proceeded to check Brittany's cervical dilation. As the nurse proceed with the examination Santana just stared at down Brittany's face while she patted her forehead with a cool, damp cloth. The nurse smiled at both of them when she was finished and immediately reported back to the doctor.</p><p>"Alright, Mrs. Brittany," the doctor chimed in as she adjusted the fit of her medical gloves, scooting her stool closer to the edge of the bed where Brittany lie. "Your cervix is fully dilated. It's time to really start pushing. Just keep in mind the different breathing techniques we practiced and implement them when needed. And let's have this baby," she continued while smiling affectionally at both women.</p><p>Santana's face lit up with a huge smile, her dimples quickly coming into focus and her nose scrunched up with excitement, as she looked down at Brittany again and mouthed a playful ‘yay!’ while clapping her hands.</p><p>Brittany closed her eyes, weary, and lowered her head back onto her pillow. She released Santana's hand and grabbed onto the bed rail, wincing in discomfort. Everyone in the room looked at her with anticipation as she lifted her head up again, her chin tucked tightly against her chest, and created a force within her lower abdomen with every ounce of strength she had. Santana scanned her wife's face while a look of sympathy take over her own as Brittany let out a painful groan.</p><p>"Very good," the doctor exclaimed as she glanced up at Brittany with approval, her tone strong and encouraging. "Let’s keep going at this pace. When you feel a contraction coming, you can go ahead and push."</p><p>Santana's face winced as she looked down at Brittany's, who was covered in sweat and pure defeat as the hard work was only just beginning. Brittany exhaled loudly and groaned in pain. </p><p>"Let’s continue," the doctor ordered a few moments later, nodding her head toward Brittany. </p><p>"I can’t," she cried out desperately. "It hurts too much."</p><p>"Yes, you can," Santana replied sternly, lifting her hand to dab Brittany's forehead with the damp cloth again. "Relax for a second, take a deep breath, and try again. Take my hand again," she offered, holding her hand out. </p><p>"I can’t, Santana," Brittany whined, letting her head fall back against the pillow again. Brittany knows she can't stop now, but the pain overtook any other logical response. "I have no energy left."</p><p>"Mrs. Lopez-Pierce, do you feel like you might need the epidural?" a nearby nurse asked, scanning Brittany's face for a reaction. Brittany shook her head while biting down on her bottom lip.</p><p>“We have been waiting so long to meet our little baby, “Santana reminds her. "Our child, Britt. We are almost there. You can do this. If you need the epidural, it's okay. We all know you're giving it your best. No one will think any less of you."</p><p>"No, I don't want it."</p><p>Brittany began to push again as the contractions returned, groaning loudly again through the discomfort. The minutes quickly passed by with very little progress. She pushed again at the doctor's request, pushing against Santana's chest with her hand as the pain consumed her. Brittany began to pant as the sweat dripped from the top of her face into her eyes like a waterfall. The sudden sting of fire she felt in her eyes was nothing she felt was nothing in comparison to the pain. A nearby nurse checked the fluid amount in the IV bag she was hooked up to.</p><p>"Why is this baby not coming out?!" Brittany pleaded loudly, her face reddening with frustration. Santana leaned over and pressed her forehead against Brittany's cheek in an attempt to soothe her.</p><p>"Let’s get some oxygen on her," the doctor ordered, ushering a nearby nurse to act immediately. "I think we should change positions, Brittany," she added. "Let’s sit you up."</p><p>Another nurse came over to help Brittany sit up from a lying position and assisted her to navigate toward the end of the bed, removing the protective sheet that was covering the lower half of her body, then proceeded to fit her with an oxygen mask. Now completely bare and fully exposed, seeing Brittany in the act of giving birth was a breathtaking sight for Santana. She looked at her wife with tears in her eyes, marvelling in the beauty that appeared before her, etching this exact memory and image into her brain.  </p><p>"I want you to sit behind me," Brittany requested, locking eyes with Santana and snapping her out of her trance. "Like we practiced."</p><p>"Alright, let’s go, Santana," the doctor chimed in quickly as she glanced at her, motioning Santana to hurry and move into place.</p><p>Santana kicked her sneakers off and swiftly climbed into the hospital bed directly behind Brittany, scooting up against her backside, her legs on either side of her waist, their bodies pressed closely together. Brittany immediately fell back into the familiar mold of Santana's form as Santana wrapped her arms around Brittany's upper waist, relaxing her hands against Brittany’s bulging stomach. Brittany placed her hands on top of Santana's and intertwined their fingers.</p><p>"I'm here," Santana whispered into her left ear, her lips softly grazing against Brittany's skin causing goosebumps to immediately rise on her arms. "I love you. So, so much."</p><p>
  <em>Inhale, exhale.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Push.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Inhale, exhale.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Push.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Inhale, exhale.</em>
</p><p>"Ladies," the doctor began, cheerfully. "The baby's head is starting to crown. Your little one is on their way. You have got to keep pushing!"</p><p>Brittany wailed, slowly succumbing to the pain.</p><p>"Keep it up, Brittany!" a nurse chanted, checking nearby monitors again. "You can do this!"</p><p>"Come on, Britt," Santana encouraged her, squeezing their hands tighter together.</p><p>Brittany dropped her head back forcefully against Santana and groaned loudly as she pushed once again, the loudest wail of the night erupting from her lips.</p><p>"The shoulders are coming through! Your baby is almost out!" the doctor announced. "I need one more big push!"</p><p>
  <em>Push...</em>
</p><p>"Come on! Come on!"</p><p>
  <em>Push...</em>
</p><p>"You've got it, Brittany!"</p><p>A few more seconds passed by quietly and then an immediate high-pitched cry filled the entire room. The doctor slowly stood from her stool and carefully lifted the baby up in the air for both women to see; a nurse stepped up and began to clear the baby's airway. Tears began to tumble fast down Santana's cheeks as she smiled into the side of Brittany's face. Brittany fought to keep her eyes open, the look of defeat crowning itself as the champion for the moment. She relaxed completely into Santana's arms seemingly forgetting for a brief second that she had just brought new life into the world.</p><p>"Take a look at your little one," the doctor said, a twinkle in her eye as she winked at both of the new mothers.</p><p>"It’s a boy, Brittany!" Santana beamed, sniffling uncontrollably. "We have a son! Oh my God, we have a son."</p><p>Santana and Brittany both sat together, sobbing quietly, staring at the new life that they had waited so long to meet. His head was covered in thick black hair, his cheeks chubby and pink.</p><p>"He looks just like you, Santana," Brittany claimed, both the nurses and doctor erupting in laughter. Santana could only smile and continue to embrace Brittany in her arms. He was a wish they had for nearly five years and he was finally here.</p><p>The doctor handed the baby to a nurse who proceeded to wrap him in a towel, then she reached for a pair of sterile surgical scissors and held them toward Santana, who looked up at her slightly confused.</p><p>"We discussed it a few times. Brittany wanted you to be the one to cut the umbilical cord," the doctor announced, smiling, holding the scissors out toward her. </p><p>"He's your son, too," Brittany added. "And it's important to me that you're part of this as much as possible."</p><p>Santana began sobbing loudly in unison with her new son as she was overcome with emotion. She scooted out from behind Brittany and climbed off of the bed. She steadied herself to her feet as she reached up at took the scissors from Dr. Patton, who was smiling lovingly at her. The nurse walked toward Santana and held their son out toward her; Santana looked back at Brittany who was glowing with pride. </p>
<hr/><p>Nearly an hour later Santana hurried toward the waiting room, a mixture of exhaustion and accomplishment dancing upon her face, as she heard familiar voices chatting. As she neared closer and turned the corner, everyone stood up from their chairs in anticipation.</p><p>"Oh, Santana—" Whitney announced, excitement taking hold of her and causing her to wobble into Maribel as she steadied herself. Maribel wrapped her arm around Whitney‘s waist to help her remain balanced as they welcomed new information.</p><p>"Damn, girl. You look like you just had a baby," Sam quipped as Mercedes smacked him in the stomach causing him to jolt forward. Santana rolled her eyes playfully and dismissed the idea of replying with an insult of her own.</p><p>"The baby is finally here and<em> he</em> is absolutely perfect," Santana said as she smiled, raising both hands in the air with triumph. "Seven pounds and 11 ounces. Brittany and—" she stopped to smile wider, unable to control the emotions that coursed through her body, "—our son are doing well."</p><p>"It's a boy!" Blaine loudly announced, smiling, looking over at Kurt.</p><p>Everyone began to softly clap and cheer as a small circle began to form around Santana. Everyone began hugging one another while some wiped tears from their eyes. Sam pulled a blue, unlit cigar out of his back pocket and put it between his lips in celebration as he looked toward Mercedes and whispered, "I guessed the baby's sex correctly, so you know what that means."</p><p>"One date. That's all you'll get out of me," Mercedes replied, rolling her eyes playfully. "But that's it. And I'm not going home with you," she added, smirking.</p><p>Whitney suddenly began to look around in a panic and announced, "Oh, crap. My husband had to go the van to get something. He missed the whole birth thing!" Everyone broke out in an uproarious laughter.</p><p>"Does the little guy have a name yet?" Kurt asked, leaning against Santana as he put his arm around her shoulder.</p><p>"He does," Santana replied, grinning, as she slid her arm around his waist. "But Britt wants you all to meet him first. Give us about ten minutes and then you guys can join us."</p><p>"Do you guys have any snacks back there?" Sam asked. Mercedes slapped him playfully across the back of his head.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Hey, little mommy," Mercedes said, announcing herself in a low whisper, as she slowly swung the door open and peered into the dimply lit room at Brittany, who lay propped up in her hospital bed cradling her newborn son in a yellow, wool blanket. "Santana said we could come in and see you. Everyone's here and we are all so excited to meet him." </p><p>"Yeah, of course. Come in, you guys," Brittany answered tiredly, forcing a weak smile upon her face. She cradled her son in the direction of the door just as Santana exited the small bathroom within the room, the guests quietly trickling in one by one like a herd of sheep. "Look at all of the people who came <em>just</em> to see you," she whispered down toward him.</p><p>Everyone slowly gathered around the side of the bed as Maribel, Whitney and Blair wiggled their way to the front of the forming crowd. Santana sat down on the bed directly next to Brittany, her hands folded against herself in her lap, and leaned down to kiss the baby on the forehead as she beamed with pride. Maribel put both of her hands on top of Santana's shoulders and gave them a gentle squeeze as Santana craned her neck back toward her mother and gave her a warm smile. </p><p>"Everyone say hi to Lucas Gabriel Lopez-Pierce," Brittany announced with pride as she glanced over at Santana and then down at the dark-haired baby whose whose lips puckered up as he let out a soft gurgle. "We will call him Luke," she added.</p><p>"Oh, that's an absolutely lovely name, girls," Maribel voiced, smiling widely. "It's nice and strong."</p><p>"Hi, Luke," Rachel whispered in a soft tone as everyone observed the now family of three. "All of us are your new aunts and uncles. There are quite a few of us as you can see, but we are one big, happy family that will always be there for you."</p><p>"He is absolutely gorgeous, ladies," Blaine added. "Look at that wild hair."</p><p>"Thank you," Brittany mouthed silently toward Blaine, looking down again at Luke who then let out a silent yawn. "I guess he's had a pretty long day," she chuckled.</p><p>"I can't believe that I'm finally a grandma," Whitney proudly proclaimed, placing her hand against Brittany's forearm. "I'm already so in love with the little guy."</p><p>"I think he looks exactly like Santana," Kurt proclaimed, chuckling to himself, as Luke furrowed his eyebrows and began to let out a soft cry. "He's already just like <em>one</em> of his mothers. Look at all that attitude."</p><p>"That's exactly what I said," Santana agreed, smirking playfully, pumping her hands in air the air as she stood up from the bed. A few collective chuckles could be heard within the room. "So, does anyone here, <em>except</em> for my beautiful wife, want a glass of wine to celebrate? We also have sparkling cider or ginger ale for those who don't want to drink."</p><p>A collection of voices chimed in with a resounding "<em>yes</em>." Kurt and Blaine walked over to the table where the wine bottles stood and began to pass out both blue and pink plastic party glasses. Santana, preparing to leave Brittany's side to assist with the distribution of wine to their guests, lowered her head and quickly met Brittany's eyes with her own. Brittany mouthed a silent "<em>come here</em>" and Santana leaned in toward them both, allowing Luke's tiny fingers to wrap around her pinky finger on her right hand, and met Brittany's lips for a soft, chaste peck. They both smiled at one another as their lips slowly parted.</p><p>"Are you ready to try and hold your son again?" Brittany leaned forward and asked in a whisper so the others couldn't hear her. "Don't be so nervous, San. He doesn't wiggle so much yet," she added sweetly.</p><p>"I was just going to help with the guys with the wine and stuff," Santana tried to avert, glancing over at Blaine who was busy inspecting the bottles.</p><p>"I think they can handle it, dear. You're a new mom, too. Stay here with Brittany and enjoy these moments with your new family," Maribel encouraged. "They'll be gone before you know it."</p><p>"You need the practice <em>and</em> I love watching you hold him," Brittany quickly added.</p><p>"Yeah, okay. You're right," Santana replied nervously as Maribel stood close by her, smiling as she witnessed a tender moment between her daughter and her growing family. "Give me the little worm. I think I'm ready."</p><p>Brittany supported Luke's head with her left hand as Santana put her hands underneath Brittany's right arm and the thick blanket that he was bundled in. Brittany then lifted the tiny baby and placed him against Santana's chest, helping her to adjust him in her arms, as Santana then cradled him against her. Brittany pulled her arms away, smiling.</p><p>"See? He's basically just a really big burrito," Brittany playfully added.</p><p>"Put the crook of your arm a bit more underneath his head," Maribel urged, helping her daughter adjust her brand new son in her arms. "Like this," she added as she continued to assist Santana in supporting him properly.</p><p>Santana settled in and began to gently rock Luke back and forth, swaying from side to side, looking up at their guests. Whitney stood on the other side of the bed and began snapping several pictures with her mobile phone, the obnoxiously loud tone embarrassing to Brittany.</p><p>"I need a new wallpaper for my phone," Whitney announced as she continued to capture the moment. Brittany shook her head in laughter, turning a slight shade of red, as she watched her mother struggle with the electronic device. "Brittany never sends us pictures. I only have what she and Santana post on The Instagram, which ain't much these days."</p><p>"<em>The Instagram</em>," Rachel charmingly repeated under her breath as she covered her mouth with her hand. Mercedes and Quinn attempted to hide their laughter.</p><p>A loud pop then bounced off the walls and soft cheers resonated throughout the room. Wine spilled over from the bottle that Blaine triumphantly held in the air as he raised his voice, "To Santana and Brittany and, most of all, to Luke! You both deserve every bit of happiness this little guy is going to bring you. You will be such amazing parents. Kurt and I, all of us, are looking forward to watching it all unfold."</p><p>"Fatherhood has changed our lives in such a magical way," Kurt added. "We are here for both of you as you begin this journey."</p><p>"Shut up, fellas, and pour us some wine!" Sam chimed in, offering a playful smile.</p><p>The guests began huddling together as Blaine sloppily tipped the wine bottle into each of the glasses stretched out in their hands.</p><p>"Welcome to this big, crazy world, Luke. We are going to give you everything you will ever need," Santana whispered to her son as Maribel took a hand to softly stroke his tiny fingers.</p><p>"Has anyone seen my dad?" Brittany asked bewildered, looking around.</p>
<hr/><p>Santana sat in a weathered, wooden chair on the tiny balcony of Brittany's hospital room with an unlit cigarette in her hand. She twirled it between her fingers as she flicked the lighter repeatedly in the other, tiny flames bouncing around in the reflection of her eyes. She was enjoying the view of the sun in its final stages of lowering into the night sky and the sound of cars roaring by on the busy street below her. Most of the guests had trickled back home or back to their hotel rooms throughout the afternoon and evening; a few lingered around taking turns holding Luke and chatting with one another.  </p><p>Santana glanced up curiously as she heard the the sliding glass door being pushed open, Kurt stepping outside into the cold air, a half empty glass of wine in his hand. He tugged at the scarf around his neck with the other as he acknowledged the freezing, and continually dropping, temperature that was settling into the air.</p><p>"Mind if I join you?" he asked, taking a seat directly across from Santana. He squirmed from the feel of the cold wood as he sat down.</p><p>Santana put the cigarette up to her lips and lit it as she nodded in his direction. She inhaled deeply and exhaled the smoke in the opposite direction of Kurt while avoiding eye contact. Kurt fixed his eyes onto her and sighed loudly. </p><p>"What are you doing? Brittany will kill you if she sees you smoking," he exclaimed through gritted teeth, looking back inside to see Brittany chatting with Maribel who was seated on the edge of her bed. "She won’t want that habit, that terrible smell, around your baby."</p><p>"She knows," Santana replied as she rolled her eyes, flicking the ashes toward the ground. "It's the only thing that calms my nerves and right now Santana needs to be on her best behavior."</p><p>"It smells awful," Kurt snarled, waving the smoke that trailed in his direction. "And it's unattractive."</p><p>"Did you come out here to make small talk, Kurt, or to give me a lecture? Because you know what? You can march your happy ass right back inside and parade around with your little—"</p><p>"<em>Santana</em>," Kurt interrupted harshly. "You know exactly why I came out here. I'm really worried about you. I'm worried about the <em>both</em> of you. You haven't returned any of my texts or calls, and you've been ignoring Rachel, too. I feel like you've even been trying to avoid me as much as possible since I got here."</p><p>"Brittany just gave birth to our first child. I'm so, <em>so</em> sorry that I didn't respond to your 100th text message casually asking me how I'm doing when you know things are complete shit right now," Santana responded, her tone clearly annoyed. "I’ve had better things to do."</p><p>Kurt pursed his lips in frustration and took a small sip of his wine as he continued to stare at her trying to dissect his friend's thoughts. Santana immediately looked at him apologetically and lowered her eyebrows in frustration. She knew he was just trying to be a good friend.</p><p>"I'm sorry," she genuinely offered. "I'm just on edge."</p><p>"I understand that, Santana, but don't shut me out. I'm your friend, and let's be a little honest here, you don't really have that many right now."</p><p>Santana said nothing in response and looked away, puffing on her cigarette again, unconcerned.</p><p>"You and Brittany seem to be doing better, though," Kurt continued, waving at the trailing cigarette smoke again. "At least that's how it looks, so if you're both trying to pretend like you're happy and well, it's working. I tried a few times to talk to her and get a feel on everything, but she's kind of popular tonight and I didn't get to talk to her alone that much."</p><p>"We're on friendly terms. It's been tough as hell, at least emotionally, being around her again. She's been staying with mom and I for the past two weeks, and it's been really nice. She hasn't killed me yet, so I suppose that's a good sign."</p><p>Kurt cocked an eyebrow in surprise as he raised his hand to his chin.</p><p>"Don't worry, Hummel. I've been sleeping in the guest bed," she quickly added, a look of disappointment casting across her face. "Her mom and dad have been renovating a few of their rooms downstairs, so we figured it would be better if she stayed with us," she added.</p><p>"Well, I did notice that she's wearing her ring on her finger again," Kurt mentioned excitedly, but also curious if there was more meaning behind it. "That's a good sign, right?"</p><p>"She didn’t want the questions," Santana admitted. "Mostly from everyone else. My mom knows that we're separated, but her parents and sister don't. She’s just buying time until she figures out what she wants to do, or what and when she wants to tell everyone. Since she so desperately wanted Luke to be born in Lima, something I've <em>yet</em> to fully comprehend, we kind of have to put on the act that we are a happy family while we're here. Ain't that just grand?"</p><p>Kurt nodded his head toward Santana in sympathy. He took another sip from his wine glass for lack of anything better to say. Santana puffed on her cigarette again, pulling her legs up off the ground and against her chest.</p><p>"So, what's going to happen now?" Kurt asked.</p><p>"I’m not sure, to be honest," Santana answered, putting the cigarette down into the ashtray and reaching for her glass of wine. "I don't know if what I've done can be forgiven. I really hurt Brittany. She is the most important person in my life, she always has been, and I betrayed her and her trust in me. That's something I might not be able to forgive myself for. I don't know why I was so fucking stupid."</p><p>Blaine poked his head outside and informed Kurt that the incoming snowstorm was expected much sooner than anticipated and that they should head back to their hotel. Kurt stood up from his seat, finished off his glass of wine in one gulp, and glanced down at Santana who was seemingly staring off into oblivion.</p><p>"You will always have us, Santana. No matter what happens. And you know that Brittany loves you. I doubt that will be changing anytime soon," Kurt offered, placing his hand on her shoulder. "And now you both have a precious baby boy. So, please, get your shit together."</p><p>Kurt slid the door behind him as he stepped back inside. Santana could hear the hustle and faint chatter of voices from inside the room. She sat there for another few minutes before picking up the cigarette again and taking a long, final drag before stubbing it out. She stood from her chair, took a deep breath as she tugged the opening of her coat close to her chest, and stepped inside just as Kurt and Blaine were waving goodbye and walking out of the room; Rachel followed behind them. Only Brittany and Maribel remained and Luke lie sleeping in a nearby hospital crib.</p><p>"I'm going to head home now, girls. This storm sounds pretty bad," Maribel said as she gathered her coat and purse from the back of a nearby chair. Santana took the coat from her mother and assisted her with putting it on. Maribel looked back at her daughter and asked, "Are you coming home with me or are you going to stay here?"</p><p>"She’s going to stay here with us," Brittany quickly interjected.</p><p>Santana, somewhat surprised at what she had just heard, looked back toward Brittany and asked, "Are you sure?"</p><p>"I already asked one of the nurses to bring you a blanket and pillow," she replied, nodding to the small couch in the corner of the room. "She told me it pulls out into a bed and is pretty comfortable. You can go back with your mom if that's what <em>you</em> want, but I would like it if you stayed."</p><p>"Of course I want to stay," Santana admitted softly, relief in the form of a half-smile tugging at the corner of her lips.</p><p>"Alright, that settles that," Maribel replied, hurrying to gather the rest of her belongings. "If the storm isn't so bad as they’re predicting then I will come back tomorrow morning around eight or nine."</p><p>Maribel walked over to Brittany and kissed her on the forehead as she said aloud, "I love all three of you so much." She took one last glimpse of her newborn grandson sleeping without a care in the world before heading toward Santana. </p><p>"I'm so proud of you, sweetheart," she said, embracing Santana tightly. "I knew this day would eventually come, when you and Brittany would become mothers, and I'm so happy that it was as perfect as I have always imagined it would be. I know your father would have loved to be part of it, he would be in awe seeing what you've created in the sense of a family, mija, but he <em>knows</em> and is looking down on you and is beaming with pride. He is with all three of you."</p><p>Santana remained silent, smiling, as she leaned forward and kissed her mother on the cheek. She looked back at Brittany before she walked with her mother into the quiet, dimly lit hallway.</p><p>"I love you, mom. Please text me and let me know that you made it home safely," Santana requested, tucking her long black locks behind her ears. Maribel nodded as she gave her daughter's hand a gentle squeeze before walking away, the sound of her heels becoming a faint echo with each step. She waved at her mother as she looked back before turning the corner, recognizing that she was just as wonderful and wise as always, though a bit older and hair a bit grayer.</p><p>Santana walked back inside the room and shut the door behind her, immediately turning around toward Brittany, the exhaustion from the long and exciting day finally settling in.</p><p>"Looks like it's just us," Santana mumbled, clasping her hands nervously in front of her. "A brand new family of three."</p><p>"Come here," Brittany requested in a soft whisper, patting the spot next to her on the bed as she wiggled over to the side to make more room.</p><p>She walked over to the bed apprehensively and sat down, her hands still clutched together. Brittany opened both of her arms and urged Santana into them, watching as she collapsed into them as tears instantaneously welled from deep inside and coursed down her cheeks. Santana could not control the sudden loud sobs that escaped from the back of her throat, her efforts to hush them were in vain, and all Brittany could do was let her cry as she held her against her and stroked her hair.</p><p>"It'll never be enough, Brittany. I could say it a thousand times over and I would never feel satisfied, but you have to know that I'm so sorry," Santana confessed. "You’ll never know how much. I will do anything to fix this."</p><p>Brittany didn't say anything; she couldn't even react. She wanted to, but she felt empty inside. She just let Santana sink further into her hold as she wrapped her arms around her as tightly as she could. She glanced out of the window, sighing heavily, and saw that snow was beginning to fall.</p>
<hr/><p>The night crept quickly upon them and Santana settled in comfortably into the sofa-bed in the corner of the room. Brittany was already fast asleep, looking as relaxed as one possibly could propped up in a hospital bed, and all Santana could do was stare in her direction. All of the lights in the room were turned off or dimmed except for one small lamp on a nearby table which casted a soft glow against her wife's silhouette. Santana observed the way Brittany's face looked tired, but happy. The way her chest rose with each new intake of breath. The way her mouth slightly parted as sleep consumed her. The way a few strands of blonde hair curled softly against her cheeks. Santana missed her. She missed everything she ever had. </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>One month later...</p><p>
  <strong>early December 2025</strong>
</p><p>"Brittany," Santana shouted desperately from Brittany's childhood bedroom, a once comforting place now seemingly turned upside down with moving boxes, baby furniture and unpacked suitcases. A few seconds passed with no answer. "Britt, can you please come here?"</p><p>Santana stared down at her son, clutching a white thermal romper in her hand, the look of pure frustration waltzing across her face. Luke was grinning up at her from the changing station while flapping his arms in the air. He let out a few cooing noises as Santana continued to stare down at him, her frustration quickly defeated as a smile quickly crept upon her lips.</p><p>"Why do you seem to like your other mom better than me?" she warmly asked, wiggling Luke's hand as he gripped his tiny fingers around her index finger. "I mean, I’m down with it, little man. She gives you the boob whenever you want, she lets you sleep all day. She's pretty amazing, isn't she? Lucky us.”</p><p>"What do you need, Santana?" Brittany asked sternly, walking into the bedroom as she tilted her head to the side to place the back of her earring on. "We really need to hurry. We’re already running fifteen minutes late."</p><p>"It's not like we have an appointment," Santana snarked, looking away from Brittany and staring back down at Luke who's head was titled and eyes were now beaming brightly in Brittany's direction. "They won’t care if we're a little late."</p><p>"Santana, we're going to be <em>a lot</em> late," Brittany snarled. "Being on time is one thing I strive for."</p><p>"Well, <em>your</em> son isn't cooperating and won’t let me get his pyjamas over his head,” Santana began. "He’s just so fidgety and it makes me nervous."</p><p>"You won't break him," Brittany responded, sighing loudly as she smiled. Even a whole month later, Santana was still nervous as ever around their son. Brittany can't help but find it enchanting most of the time.</p><p>"I’ll get him dressed. Put your shoes on so we can go soon," Brittany replied, stepping in front of the changing station as she took the pyjamas from Santana's hand.</p><p>"Why are you girls still here?" Whitney asked as she entered Brittany’s room. "I'm ready to have my grandson all to myself."</p><p>"We are about to leave," Brittany answered, snapping the romper closed. "I just need to put Luke's socks on him and then you get this little guy all to yourself," she continued, bending down to softly kiss the tip of Luke's nose.</p><p>"Let me, honey," Whitney asked earnestly, reaching out to softly touch Brittany’s arm. "You girls are only here for a few more days, and I want to do as much with Luke as I can," she continued, looking desperately at Brittany, tears pooling in her eyes. "Who knows when I'll get to see you three again."</p><p>"Mom, are you going to cry?" Brittany asked, tilting her head sideways toward her mother. "Don't. Please. Not yet. I <em>just</em> put a fresh coat of mascara on."</p><p>"Why would I do that?" Whitney playfully answered, quickly tapping at her eyes with the top of her shirt. "Ah, you know, I'm just going to miss y'all so much."</p><p>"It has been incredible being here with you and dad; Santana and I are beyond thankful for what you've both done for us these last four weeks. You <em>know</em> it's time for us to go back home and start our new life together, though. I promise to spam you with a lot more photos, too," Brittany replied. "But until that happens, he's all yours," she continued, picking Luke up off the changing table as she quickly swaddled a pastel green blanket around his body. Mrs. Pierce reached out and took Luke into her arms, smiling.</p><p>"I just don't know why your mommies have to live so far away," Whitney said to Luke, rocking him gently against her chest. "I'm going to have to work on that."</p><p>"Alright, Britt, I’m ready," Santana announced as she returned to the room, a bounce in her step. "Shall we?"</p><p>"We shall," Brittany answered excitedly as she and Santana both reached down for their purses on the bed. Each of them took a brief moment to say goodbye to Luke, who was already snoozing in his grandmother's arms.</p><p>"We shouldn't be back too late, mom. There's fresh breast milk in the refrigerator," Brittany began, glancing down at her watch. "I pumped it about three hours ago. He's due to eat again in about one and a half hours. And please use the glass bottles; Santana washed them and put them on the drying rack. We've been meaning to toss out the plastic ones. I don't really care for them."</p><p>Whitney smiled lovingly at her daughter, watching motherhood slowly consume her.</p><p>"If he cries a lot you can play the CD on top of the stereo to soothe him," she continued, pointing to a disc of children lullabies. "It works every time. And don't forget to turn on the nightlight when you put him down. It projects stars onto the ceiling and I'm not sure who likes it more, him or Santana."</p><p>She began nervously looking around as she pressed her hand to her forehead. "Am I forgetting something?"</p><p>"Yeah, Britt, to leave. You love punctuality, remember?" Santana said, glancing at the clock on the nightstand, then continued, "He’s going to be <em>fine</em>. Your mom is a pro. She raised two badass daughters. I think she can handle our child for a few hours." Whitney quickly nodded in agreement.</p><p>"Get outta here, girls," Whitney demanded, shooing the girls playfully out of the room and down the stairs, following behind them.</p><p>"Oh!" Brittany shrieked as she quickly turned around. "If the CD doesn't soothe him when he cries, he loves his—"</p><p>"Yellow plush dinosaur," Santana and Whitney replied in unison. Brittany smiled, slightly embarrassed. Whitney could only grin.</p><p>"Please call one of us if you need anything," Santana offered. "But I don’t think you will."</p><p>Whitney waved goodbye from the front porch, bundling Luke against her shielding him from the cold, winter night as she watched Santana and Brittany climb into their silver Toyota Highlander and drive off into the darkened night.</p>
<hr/><p>"Look who's finally here!" Blaine announced, his face beaming brightly as Santana and Brittany made their way inside the tiny townhouse. "Just forty minutes late," he continued as he glanced down at his watch. "That's an improvement from last time. Kurt will be proud."</p><p>"You’re lucky we came at all," Santana growled.</p><p>"Oh, wow, this place looks really cozy," Brittany exclaimed, looking around at the first glimpse of Blaine and Kurt's new home. It was decorated sparingly and a few moving boxes still lined the walls, but it was quaint and inviting. The small fireplace crackled and roared, the colorful lights on the Christmas tree lit up the entire room, and the satisfying smell of gingerbread-scented candles danced under their noses. It was enough for Brittany to feel content and enough for Santana to want to throw up.</p><p>"We still have a lot of work to do to make it ours, but it feels right. We are really glad to be back in Lima," Blaine admitted.</p><p>"Well, just sometimes," Kurt chimed in, walking up to greet Santana with a warm hug. He then turned to Brittany and did the same. "We got a really good deal on the place, honestly too good to pass up, and it feels really good to be back close to our parents. I do miss New York, though. Buying a hot dog off of a cart on a street corner in Lima just doesn't feel as safe as in the Big Apple. The meat here is pretty sketchy."</p><p>All four of them then stood awkwardly in the foyer seemingly waiting for someone else to break the silence that had suddenly taken over.</p><p>"So, ladies, I'll take your coats and hang them up in the guest room," Kurt continued, finally moving to help Brittany wiggle out of hers. She then excused herself to the bathroom as Blaine headed back to the kitchen to check on dinner.</p><p>"Almost time, huh?"</p><p>"Yeah, we're headed back home on Sunday," Santana informed Kurt as she unwrapped the scarf from around her neck and slipped out of her coat and handed them to him. "I’m really looking forward to it, but I'm so fucking scared. Her mom and dad have been really cool letting us stay with them to help us adjust to having Luke, but that obviously means we haven't had much alone time. Someone is always up in our business. I don't even have a good feel for how things could be for us back home. When we actually do find ourselves alone, we both just sleep out of pure exhaustion. It has been super stressful. I thought I knew what we were in for, but honestly, I truly had no idea."</p><p>Kurt gave her a knowing nod and smile.</p><p>"That's another huge bonus of being back home close to our parents. Macy is with Blaine's mom this weekend and next weekend my dad and Carole want to keep her. They kind of fight over who's going to whisk her away from us. It allows opportunities for Blaine and I to stop the organized madness within our lives and connect again. It has been very helpful. Speaking of connecting, how are things between you two?" He asked. "Better?"</p><p>"Yes and no," Santana continued. "She has relaxed a little more and we have talked a lot, but there's still a lot of work to do. Our focus has mostly been on Luke."</p><p>"Yeah, I understand that."</p><p>"She still doesn’t trust me, Kurt. I think that’s what hurts me most. She could tell me that she hates me, she could scream at me until she's blue in the face, she could want to punch me in the stomach a thousand times over, but none of those things are interesting to her. The one thing I screwed up is her trust in me. And it gnaws at me every single fucking day."</p><p>Brittany walked back toward them, smiling innocently, having not heard the conversation between the two.</p><p>"Brittany, I really like your boots. They make you look ridiculously taller, though," Kurt proclaimed, his eyes darting away from Santana as they narrowed down toward the pristine black leather platform boots that adorned her feet.</p><p>"Stella McCartney," Brittany cheerfully announced, clapping her hands excitedly. "They were an early Christmas gift from Santana. I got them last night because she couldn't wait. I'm so in love."</p><p>"With the boots or with Santana?" he asked, seemingly giggling at his own joke. Santana jeered him in his side with her elbow causing him to bolt sideways in pain.</p><p>"Both, of course," Brittany replied, grinning. Santana smiled warmly back at her. "I’m going to go see if Blaine needs any help," she continued, pointing awkwardly in the direction of the kitchen.</p><p>"Seriously, Hummel?" Santana asked quietly through gritted her teeth. Kurt could only smirk in her direction. “Where's the champagne?” she asked loudly, following a few feet behind Brittany into the kitchen. "I might need a glass or three."</p>
<hr/><p>"Oh wow, you guys, that was some incredible food. I haven’t eaten like that in weeks," Santana gushed, patting her stomach in satisfaction. "I’m going to bust if I eat another bite. You guys did really well. I didn't know Lady Hummel could cook <em>that</em> well. Thank you."</p><p>"Our pleasure," Blaine replied, smiling in Santana's direction. "Does anyone want another slice of Kurt's infamous maple pecan pie?" he continued cheerfully, standing from the table. Kurt and Santana shook their heads.</p><p>"I wouldn’t mind another small piece," Brittany voiced, lifting her dessert plate toward Blaine. "But with lots and lots of whip cream," she quickly added, smirking.</p><p>"So, a little bit of pie with your whipped cream? Coming right up," Blaine playfully replied, excusing himself from the table. He grabbed a few empty plates and bowls, stacking them together, and took them along.</p><p>"So, Brittany, are you looking forward to heading back to New York?" Kurt inquired, taking a large sip of sparkling water that he had served himself in his empty champagne glass.</p><p>"Yeah, absolutely. I guess I'm also a little nervous, but that's to be expected. We're actually both a little nervous," Brittany replied, glancing over at Santana as she offered her a genuine smile. "But I know we will be fine. I know Santana is more than ready to get back to work and I’m happy that my job will allow me to stay home with Luke for a while longer. It's kind of a dream scenario."</p><p>"Any chance on ever moving back to Lima?" Kurt continued, hope resting on the tip of his question. "You know, I used to be against it, one thousand percent against it, but it was always in the back of my mind because Blaine didn't want to stay there anymore. It was hard for us to keep our balance knowing one of us was outright miserable. I'm kind of glad to be out of the chaos, though, but I do miss Rachel."</p><p>"You miss Rachel?" Brittany deadpanned.</p><p>"Yes, sometimes," he replied, laughing, while taking another sip of water. <br/>
<br/>
“On purpose?" Brittany challenged.</p><p>"We’ve talked about it from time to time, but just casually," Santana interrupted. "If anything, we would do it just to be closer to both of our families, but at the same time New York just feels so different now. I love it, you know, it's a vibrant and picturesque place to live, but I think we are past all of that now. Sort of how it was for Blaine. We both enjoyed the nightlife plenty, somehow stayed focused long enough and got our degrees, but now it feels like the charm and appeal is slowly waning. At least that's how it feels for me."</p><p>"Yeah, I agree," Brittany remarked. "I mean, all we do now is take naps and clean up baby spit. We don't need New York's nightlife for that." They all laughed as Brittany leaned over and placed her hand on top of Santana’s and added, "You never know, but right now we are staying put.”</p><p>Blaine returned with an unopened bottle of champagne and two pieces of maple pecan pie, one for himself and the other for Brittany. Brittany's eyes widened with delight as Blaine set the plate in front of her and the whipped cream dared to wiggle off of her plate.</p>
<hr/><p>Blaine and Kurt were busying themselves clearing the dinner table and staying behind in the kitchen as they hand washed dishes trying to lessen the mess that was before them, but to also give Santana and Brittany a little bit of privacy before they joined them to watch <em>National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation.</em></p><p>Both of the young women sat facing one another on the dove-colored suede sofa in the adjacent room and welcomed the comfortable silence that accompanied them for the first time in weeks. The room was dark, but the dancing lights on the Christmas tree and the candles on the coffee table before them provided enough luminescence to easily see one another. Santana reached for the remote from the end table and commanded the large stereo in the corner to begin playing the radio. The volume was turned down to a soft whisper, allowing for a quiet, melodic setting.</p><p>"I feel like this is the first real moment we've had alone together in months," Santana said, resting her back against the arm of the couch in Brittany's direction, her hands folded in her lap and her legs crossed at the ankles as they dangled off the couch.</p><p>"Yeah, it's kind of nice, isn’t it?" Brittany mumbled in return.</p><p>"Just you and me, a bottle of Moët before us," Santana continued, her gaze glued to the beauty in front of her. "Do you want me to pour you a glass of wine? It's apparently an imported French champagne. Just a tiny sip for the taste?"</p><p>"No, not really," Brittany replied in a monotone voice, propping her elbow up on the back of the couch, resting her head on her hand and staring into the flashing Christmas tree.</p><p>"You look so beautiful tonight," Santana continued, timidly scooting closer toward Brittany. "I really love when you wear your hair down and curl it."</p><p>"I know you do," Brittany replied, slightly grinning. "I certainly wasn't trying to impress one of them," she continued, pointing with her head toward the kitchen. Santana chuckled. She felt confident in this moment; she felt sure.</p><p>Although things were not good between them, they hadn't been for nearly six months now, they were still very much a couple and things had been looking up in recent weeks. Their lips still met each other in the morning to greet the start of the day and at night to depart into slumber; simple, chaste kisses. They often reminded one another that their love was not wavering, but they both knew things were different. Trust was missing, and with that, a genuine connection and intimacy.</p><p>Sex between them had completely stopped. Passionate kissing could be forgotten. Cuddling happened once in the middle of the night by accident, and since that night Santana was asked to sleep in the guest bedroom. Hand holding happened only in front of family and friends to play the part. They were good, but they weren't. They were together, but they weren't.</p><p>It was merely three weeks before Christmas, and Santana had hopped the holiday season would ease a bit of the heartache between them. Brittany was jollier; it was her favorite time of the year. The past month in particular, since the moment Luke had entered the world, things <em>seemed</em> to be getting better. And in this moment, after a relaxing evening with dinner and a few glasses of champagne, for the first time in several months, Santana felt confident. Cautious, but confident. </p><p>"Can I kiss you?" Santana asked bluntly, her heart thumping out of her chest. She swallowed as she felt her throat tighten. She hadn't <em>kissed</em> Brittany in so long.</p><p>Brittany glanced up at her, her eyes weak with affection, but her mind with understandable apprehension. She said nothing, but watched Santana knowingly.</p><p>"I really, really want to kiss you," she continued, leaning her head in toward Brittany's. "But only if you want me to kiss you, too. Only if you'll let me."</p><p>Santana slowly lifted Brittany's chin and leaned in further, their lips mere inches apart.</p><p>"Please tell me if you don't want me to, Brittany," she whispered between them, the aroma of a sweet champagne escaping from her lips and filling the small space between their noses.</p><p>"I really want to kiss you, too," Brittany whispered, swallowing the dry air in her mouth, her eyes darting down to Santana's plump lips. "I really, <em>really</em>, really want to. But I don't know if it's a good idea."</p><p>Santana began to unconsciously chew on her bottom lip, nodding her head in understanding, as she leaned back into her side of the couch and closed her eyes. <em>Don't cry, Santana,</em> she thought to herself. <em>Toughen up. Don't let her see you cry.</em> A few seconds of awkward silence thickened the air; Brittany gazed back into the burning glow of the Christmas lights. Santana kept her eyes closed in an attempt to trap the tears that were desperately trying to push through. She respected Brittany's decision, and prepared for rejection as has happened many times in the past month, but her heart was breaking.</p><p><em>Will I ever be able to kiss her again?</em> Santana thought, panicking at the idea that she had somehow forgotten what Brittany taste like. <em>Is this really the end of us?</em></p><p>Before she could open her eyes and realize what was happening, Santana jolted as she felt <em>something</em> or <em>someone</em> push against her. She felt her face being cupped between two cold, soft hands as she opened her eyes to see her wife staring back at her with want. Brittany suddenly overpowered her, their lips meeting with intensity, erasing desire that had been seemingly building up for weeks. Santana released a soft whimper as she felt Brittany's thin lips pressed forcefully against hers, tears quickly coursing down her cheeks. Santana placed both of her hands on Brittany's waist and pulled her in closer. One small moment suddenly felt like Christmas morning.</p><p>Brittany parted both of their lips with her tongue, quickly skating it underneath Santana's top lip. Santana allowed a soft moan to escape from the back of her throat as their tongues quickly tangled together. Her mouth captured Brittany's tongue effortlessly, and she sucked on in gently as Brittany leaned further into her. This was a <em>feeling</em> she had never forgotten, but had longed for every second of every day. They sat there in one another's embrace for a few minutes just kissing. It was a small, yet giant leap for them both.</p><p>Kurt headed toward the the living room, gingerly tossing a dish towel over his shoulder, and immediately stopped in his tracks when he observed the pair on the couch from a distance. He threw both of his hands in the air with excitement and shouted a silent "yes!" to himself as he turned around and hurried back into the kitchen going unnoticed.</p><p>"They're kissing!" Kurt squealed toward Blaine in a loud whisper. "They're <em>kissing</em> kissing!"</p><p>"No way! Seriously?" Blaine gushed in return. "About time, those two..."</p><p>They gave each other a silent high five, smiling from ear to ear, as they returned to washing dishes. Maybe their best friends would be alright in the end. That would be the perfect Christmas gift of all. Kurt leaned over and turned on a small radio in the kitchen to the exact same station that was playing in the living room.</p><p>
  <em>(Christmas) Pretty lights on the tree</em><br/>
<em>(Christmas) I'm watching them shine</em><br/>
<em>(Christmas) You should be here with me</em><br/>
<em>(Christmas) Baby, please come home</em>
</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The second half of this chapter will begin a series of flashback scenes/chapters. I will do my very best to keep you, the reader, informed of when that changes. I apologize in advance if there is any confusion. Please send me a message if you find it difficult to follow. -TWP</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Santana and Brittany stood by the doorway gathering their belongings together before leaving Kurt and Blaine's house. The evening appeared to have been a giant leap forward for them. Dinner and a movie with their best friends, although Santana fell asleep <em>three times</em> and had to be woken up because her snoring deafened the movie, a bit of romantic rekindling, and optimism for their future together. <em>That's all I could have ever asked for, </em>Santana thought as she wrapped her scarf around her neck and smiled to herself. <em>Slow and sure is better than not at all.</em></p><p>"I have a confession to make," Santana admitted nervously as she reached for Brittany's coat from the rack and held it open behind her wife to assist her putting it on. She cocked her head to the side and tried to get a glimpse of Brittany's reaction before continuing, "We’re making a slight detour... and we're not going back to your house tonight."</p><p>"Care to elaborate?" Brittany asked, her eyebrows arching upward in confusion, as she slipped her arms into the coat. "We have a tiny human being to care for now."</p><p>"I booked us a hotel room downtown," Santana admitted without hesitation, her eyes carefully scanning the side of Brittany's face.<span class="Apple-converted-space"> "That's where we are headed now for the night."</span></p><p>"A hotel room? For what?" Brittany asked, turning around to face Santana. </p><p>"What do you mean 'for what?' For us, Brittany. Your mom and I talked a few days ago when you were taking a nap, and I told her that all I wished for right now was at least one night with you alone before we head back to New York. Not you and I upstairs hanging out in your room pretending that we're alone. She was very understanding and actually encouraged it. So, with her blessing, I booked us a room just so that we can get away, even if for less than 24 hours. I want us to be able to talk and to just <em>be</em>. We need this, Britt. I even packed us a small bag with everything we will need. It's just for <em>one</em> night. Can I please have that?"</p><p>"So that's what the bag was for," Brittany quietly said to herself. "Look, I don’t know if I like the idea of this. I mean, I'm not comfortable leaving Luke overnight with <em>just </em>my parents. Not yet," she continued, now twisting her own scarf around her neck. "And I really don’t think that staying at a hotel for one night is going to solve all of our problems, Santana. My parents can watch Luke for a few hours if you feel like you just need a break. I'm sure my sister would be happy to watch him, too. We don't need to get away to do that."</p><p>"Britt," Santana began, her voice lowering to an aggravated whisper, looking over her shoulder to see if Blaine or Kurt were within earshot. "First of all, your sister can't even take care of a Chia Pet. Have you see her apartment? It's a morgue for dead plants. Secondly, I <em>can't</em> live this anymore. I need whatever is going on between us to get resolved. Or, you know, seeing some type of progress would be really nice. We can't continue like this forever."</p><p>"Like what?" Brittany asked sharply, turning around. Santana sighed heavily in frustration.</p><p><span class="Apple-converted-space"> "</span>Are you being serious with me right now? <em>What</em> is going on between us? Are we good? Are we done? Everything is still so awkward between us and I can't take it anymore. It's slowly driving me insane. You won't even talk to me about it," Santana continued, slipping into her own coat. She looked over her shoulder to make sure Kurt or Blaine still weren't around before continuing, "That’s all I want from you. I just want to talk. I didn't do this with any other intentions."</p><p>"That’s incredibly bold of you, Santana," Brittany answered sarcastically. "Talking is the one thing you've never been great it. Be careful what you say next."</p><p>"I just want to know where we stand. I need to know that you still want me," Santana said, taking both of Brittany's hands in hers and holding onto them tightly. "I'm so scared to touch you sometimes, or to even look at you a certain way. Other times I feel like you want me to do those things. I never know what kind of reaction I'm going to get. I got to kiss you, like <em>really</em> kiss you, for the first time in about, what? Five, six months? Then during that lame ass movie I tried to hold your hand <em>twice </em>and you pulled away. <em>What</em> am I supposed to think?"</p><p>"I don't know. I don’t know what <em>I'm</em> supposed to be thinking half of the time," Brittany answered quietly, taking her hands from Santana's grip.</p><p>"Please," Santana begged. "Just one night. <em>Please, </em>Brittany. I'll put all of my cards out onto the table. I'll tell you everything."</p><p>Kurt suddenly arrived around the corner with a Tupperware container in his hand, "Two slices of maple pecan pie to go," he announced cheerfully. Brittany smiled widely in his direction as she took the container from him.</p><p>Kurt put his hand on her shoulder, squeezing gently, before continuing, “Thank you both so much for joining us tonight. It was really good to spend some time with you guys before you head back, and I truly mean it when I say that Blaine and I are going to miss you so much."</p><p>"Yeah, it's a real bummer," Blaine added as he appeared around the corner from the kitchen. "There will be a massive hole in our lives without the Lopez-Pierce clan."</p><p>"Call us whenever you want. Video chat, text, e-mail," Kurt added. "Don't be strangers. Especially you, Santana."</p><p>"One last group selfie before you guys go," Blaine said as he quickly pulled his mobile phone out of his back pocket. Santana rolled her eyes as Blaine swung his arm around her shoulder and gave her a toothy grin. All four of them huddled closely, bodies and faces pressed tightly together, as Blaine snapped several photos. </p><hr/><p>"You'll be in room 409 which is located in the west wing of the fourth floor. The elevator can be found down this hallway to your right," the young, brown-haired receptionist explained, pointing to her left, as she handed over two plastic cards to Santana. "If you've reached the entrance to the indoor swimming pool then you've got too far. These are your room keys. If they are lost or not returned then a $15 replacement feewill be added to your account. The restaurant, which is located on the second floor, is open daily from 11 am until 11 pm and the bar is open until 2 am.  Will that be all, Mrs. Lopez-Pierce? Do you have any questions for me?"</p><p>"No questions, thank you," Santana replied, smiling politely at the girl, as she tapped the tips of the plastic cards against the counter. She leaned over the counter and snagged two complimentary peppermints from a tiny bowl and pushed them down into her front pocket.</p><p>"Then you're all set. Enjoy your stay and let us know if you need anything," the receptionist concluded, smiling.</p><p>Santana walked back toward Brittany who was seated in a nearby chair flipping aimlessly through a magazine. She leaned over and picked up the duffel bag that lay at Brittany's feet and motioned with her head for Brittany to come along with her. Once they got to their room, observed their temporary home for the night, Santana immediately headed for the balcony.</p><p>"If you don't mind, I'm going to have a cigarette real quick," Santana announced as she tugged on the sliding door and pulled it open, glancing back at Brittany who took a seat on the edge of the bed.</p><p>"I haven't stopped you from smoking the last few weeks, have I?" Brittany admitted, reaching behind her to pull her mobile phone out of her back pocket. "I don't like it, but that's not news to you. Do what you need to do. I'm going to call my mom and dad and check in," Brittany continued, seemingly nervous or annoyed, or even both<em>.</em></p><p>Santana stepped out onto the balcony, the cigarette already balancing lazily between her lips, as she pulled her lighter out of her purse. She covered the cigarette with one hand as she lit it with the other, inhaling deeply as the tip of the cigarette sizzled against the flame. She exhaled and closed her eyes as a sense of immediate relaxation came over her. After a brief moment she opened her eyes and glanced inside the room to see Brittany chatting on the phone very animatedly, a smile on her face as she talked about their son. As she just stared at her wife, admiring her beauty from afar, her thoughts began racing to <em>that night; </em>the night that set the tone for the relationship and the reason they are in this hotel room right <em>now.</em></p><p>She took another drag from her cigarette, looked up into the twinkling night sky, as her mind wandered back to the day when everything changed. </p><hr/><p>
  <span class="u"> <strong>six months earlier</strong> </span>
</p><p>
  <b> May, 2025</b>
</p><p> </p><p>Brittany was standing in the kitchen of their quaint New York apartment preparing dinner, chopping a large onion against a bamboo cutting board, when she heard the front door open and then shut a second later. The sound of boiling water and oil sizzling in a frying pan roared in the background as steam began to coat the air in the kitchen. Santana walked into the room a few minutes later, tossed her purse lazily onto a nearby dining chair, as she thumbed through the mail she brought in with her. </p><p>"Hey, baby girl," she purred as she announced her arrival, walking up behind Brittany and lightly touching her waist with a free hand. "Mmm, it smells really nice in here. How are you?"</p><p>Brittany didn't say anything in return, just let out a slight sniffle, as she continued to chop the onion. Her hands showed anger; she chopped the vegetable in a perturbed rhythm.  Santana looked at her wife closely, scanning her facial features with concern, and noticed that her eyes looked strained; they were slightly puffy and red. She walked over to the table in the middle of the room and casually tossed the mail down and returned to her wife and asked, "Britt, have you been crying? Are you okay?"</p><p>"I'm chopping onions," Brittany answered flatly, grabbing the top of her shirt and rubbed it roughly into her eyes.</p><p>"Yeah, but what kind of onions are these?" Santana asked sarcastically as she stood directly behind her, putting her hands on top of Brittany's shoulders, squeezing them lightly as she snuggled up close behind her. She rested her chin on the top of Brittany's left shoulder, her voice softening as she continued, "It's more than that, isn't it? Talk to me. Did something happen at work today?"</p><p>"Nothing happened at work. Just a typical day."</p><p>"Then what's going on?"</p><p>Brittany stilled her hand as she stared blankly toward the wall in front of her. She pushed the cutting board forward, setting the knife down with one hand, and reached over to the stove and turned both the boiling water and frying pan on the lowest heat with the other. She then turned and faced Santana, crossing her arms, her face seemingly empty with expression.</p><p>"Britt, I'm getting a little nervous here."</p><p>"Is there something you should be nervous about?"</p><p>"Have I done something to upset you?"</p><p>"Again I'll ask you, is there something you should be nervous about?"</p><p>"No," Santana replied matter-of-factly, her tone somewhat defensive. She crossed her arms against her chest and lifted her chin in the air.</p><p>Brittany pursed her lips and sighed heavily. Her eyes scanned Santana's face and then dropped to the floor, " I went to the coffee shop on the corner of Poplar Street after work and I bumped into someone."</p><p>"...and?"</p><p>"This person, a woman, asked me how I was doing, which I thought was incredibly nice of her, albeit a bit awkward," Brittany continued, now staring directly into Santana's eyes. "Then she asked me how we were doing, and I was kind of taken aback and somewhat surprised that she was suddenly so genuinely invested in our lives," she added. </p><p>"So you bumped into Rachel at a coffee shop and she said something fucked up or egotistical and sent you home in tears?" Santana asked, confused. "Look, I know you don't like her and do everything you can to avoid her like the plague, so you really shouldn't let anything she says or does get under your skin, Britt."</p><p>"Dani," Brittany snapped. "It was Dani."</p><p>Santana's eyes widened involuntarily and her heart felt like it had stopped. No, no, no, Santana thought. She stepped forward to close the small gap between them and attempted to put her arms around Brittany's shoulders. Brittany immediately lifted her arms with force to block Santana's action. </p><p>"Brittany, why are you upset? What did she say to you? Let's talk about this before you get all worked up. It isn't what you think it is, I swear to God," Santana said, her voice beginning to tremble . Brittany's stare terrified Santana. "What the fuck did she say?"</p><p>"You tell me what she said, Santana," Brittany said coldly. She turned back toward the counter and picked up the knife again and began chopping at the onion, anger and rage behind each new slice into the vegetable. </p><p>"I don't know! There's nothing to tell you!" Santana bellowed.</p><p>"Since when have you two been hanging out?"</p><p>"Britt, no. It's not like that," Santana pleaded, tenderly grabbing Brittany's arm in an attempt to get her to look in her direction. "Baby..."</p><p>"So you're telling me that you haven't been hanging out with her?"  she asked, casually pulling away from Santana's hold, continuing to chop away at the defenseless onion. Santana didn't answer. "Silence is sometimes worse, Santana. It says more than you think."</p><p>"Fuck, I know, I know," Santana stuttered. "Yes, I have seen her a few times. I saw her for the first time maybe a month or so ago."</p><p>Brittany hummed low in response.</p><p>Brittany put the knife down again and pressed her palms flat against the countertop, arching her back slightly as she bent her head downward to face the ground. Her neck and face began to flush as she tapped her fingernails loudly against the counter. Santana just stood there, silent, her fingers on her left hand making their way toward her mouth. Biting her nails was something she did when she felt uneasy or out of control. She just watched Brittany; she waited for her to say something, anything.</p><p>"I want you to pack yourself a bag and leave," Brittany asked. "Now."</p><p>"Baby, no," Santana quavered, tears suddenly racing down her cheeks. "It's not at all what you think. I don't know what she told you, but there's nothing to worry about! Don't do this. Let's talk. Ask me anything and I'll tell you the truth!"</p><p>"I don't want to talk to you right now. It's clear that being upfront with me was never something you planned on doing," Brittany replied. She turned to look at Santana, her eyes cold and dark, and continued, "Either you pack a bag and leave or I will."</p><p>"Do you want me to call her? Britt, I'll get her on the phone and you can ask her anything!"</p><p>"Santana, this conversation is over."</p><p>"Where am I supposed to go? What am I supposed to do?" Santana asked, throwing her hands in the air. "Why can't we talk about this? Why aren't you giving me a chance to explain myself?"</p><p>"Please go."</p><p>"Baby, don't do this," she begged in a whisper. "Where am I supposed to go?" she repeated, her voice raspy, cracking with fear and desperation.</p><p>"Why don't you try calling Dani? It seems you two are pretty close these days. I'm sure she has a couch for you to sleep on."</p><p>"Brittany, you can't be serious."</p><p>Brittany leaned over toward the stove again and turned the burners off completely. She walked out of the kitchen and into the bathroom, slamming the door loudly behind her. Santana put her hand up to her mouth and closed her eyes, tears tumbling down her face like rough waves from the ocean before a tsunami. She stood there for a few minutes as she contemplated what she was going to do. Santana looked down at her feet as she felt a familiar feeling against her. Lord Tubbington, old and feeble in his 18 years, rubbed his backside against her leg as he let out a soft cry. She reached down and picked up the meek, tired cat and held him against her chest as he began to purr loudly into her neck.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Rain was threatening to fall from the blackened sky as Santana stood at the main entrance of the building of the quaint Bushwick apartment that she was all too familiar with. She didn't want to be here, standing in front of a place she swore she'd never return to unless rent was free or someone had died, but where else could she go? Even if she had no other place to turn to, she would never call Dani in a moment like this. <em>I'd rather sleep on the dirty streets and share a bed with some posh sewer rats</em>, Santana thought. <em>Brittany just needs a few days to herself. Then I can explain everything to her and it will be just fine.</em></p><p>She grasped her duffel bag tighter in her hand and, with all the pride she could muster within herself, pressed the nameplate that read <strong>BERRY / ST. JAMES</strong>. <em>Bzzz, </em>it echoed loudly into her ears<em>.</em> Impatient as she ever was, she pressed it again quickly. <em>Bzzz.</em></p><p>A few moments passed before a feminine voice answered from the other side of the intercom, "Hello?"</p><p>"Let me in," Santana demanded quickly, her tone rough and tired. "'It's starting to rain."</p><p>"Who is this?" the woman asked politely. Santana scoffed loudly, rolling her eyes.</p><p>"Come on, Berry. Just open the freakin' door."</p><p>"Santana? Is that you? Hold on a second, I'll buzz you in."</p><p>"Hallelujah," Santana replied flatly, pushing the door forward once she was granted access to the building.</p><p>When she reached Rachel's apartment a few minutes later, after trying to stay upright in heels after climbing four flights of stairs, she could see that the door to Rachel's apartment was left slightly ajar. <em>Why didn't I change my fucking shoes?</em> She groaned to herself. A few seconds later the petite, brown-haired girl appeared in view, seemingly surprised to greet her unexpected guest, pushing the door open wider. She smiled as their eyes met and asked, "What in the world are you doing here? Is everything okay?"</p><p>"I'm crashing here for a few days. Thanks," she replied bluntly, pushing past Rachel and entering the apartment as her eyes scanned the place. "God, it looks and <em>smells</em> the exact same here." Santana dropped her bag at her feet with conviction. "Where's lover boy?"</p><p>"Do you mean my husband Jesse? He always works a bit later on Friday nights. He should be home in a few hours," Rachel replied as she took a brief moment to glance out into the hallway to make sure no one else was coming, pulling the door closed behind her. She turned around and looked back at Santana and asked, "Where's Brittany? What's going on?"</p><p>"Yeah."</p><p>"Yeah?" </p><p>"<em>Yeah.</em> We had a slight misunderstanding and she sort of kicked me out of the apartment."</p><p>"She did what?" Rachel asks, puzzled, her hands resting on her hips. "She kicked you out after a misunderstanding? I see. I'm really sorry to hear that."</p><p>"It all happened insanely fast and I didn't have much time to explain myself; she wouldn't let me. I had just gotten home from work and shit hit the fan in less than ten seconds. I don't really have anywhere else to go," Santana admits, embarrassed. She shifts her eye's away from Rachel's face and focuses anywhere but on her. I can't really afford to put myself up in a hotel for a few days. It would be kind of cool, okay, <em>really</em> cool of you and Jesse if you could let me hang out here."</p><p>"<em>You</em> want to stay here with <em>us</em>?"</p><p>"Well, I certainly don't <em>want</em> to, Rachel. I've kind of got no choice," Santana barked, dropping her duffel bag at her feet. "The last thing I'd ever want to do is come crawling to <em>your</em> feet when shit gets a little crazy."</p><p>Rachel clasped her hands together unsure of what to say or do. She and Santana hadn't been on the friendliest of terms for the past two years. In fact, they hadn't even spoken to each other at all. She only knew she still lived in the same 'ole musty apartment with Jesse because of Kurt. Rachel offered a smile to Santana, "Whatever happened must've been pretty serious if you're sitting on <em>my</em> couch. Do you want to talk about it? I can make you a cup of tea or coffee, we even have a pitcher of fresh lemonade I made this afternoon, and we can chat. You know, like girlfriends do sometimes."</p><p>"I'm more of a vodka and coke kind of gal. Got that?"</p><p>"You know we don't drink much, Santana. I don't even remember the last time we had an alcoholic beverage in our refrigerator."</p><p>"Yeah, didn't think so. Honestly, I just want to take a few Tylenol and take a really long nap," she replied. Santana's eyes tried to trap Rachel's as her voice softened with desperation, "Just give me two or three days, Rach. I won't be here longer than that. Brittany just needs some time cool down and then I can work things out with her. Please?"</p><p>"I'm not going to turn you away. I would never do that. Of course you're welcome to stay here as long as you need. If you'd prefer to stay in a hotel, you know, that's fine, too. We can loan you some money. I mean, you can absolutely stay here. I'm not trying to push you out or anything. It's just, you know, the apartment is really small and we can't offer so much in the way of space or privacy."</p><p>Santana patted the lumpy couch as she plopped down, "It feels like a bed to me. Home sweet home."</p><p>"It's settled then. Welcome to Casa St. Berry!" Rachel beamed, clapping to herself. "Exciting!"</p><p>Rachel smiled as she excused herself to the bathroom while Santana began to unpack a few of her things from her bag. She closed the door behind her and pulled her mobile phone out of her back pocket and quickly scanned through her contacts. She typed as swiftly as possible and pressed send.</p><p><em>Hi, Brittany. It's Rachel Berry. </em> <em>I don't know what's going on and it isn't important right now, I just wanted to let you know that Santana is staying with us. </em></p><p>Almost immediately Rachel's phone vibrated in her hand with a reply from Brittany.</p><p>
  <em>I know who you are, Rachel. I'm happy to hear this, though. I appreciate the text.</em>
</p><p>With that, Rachel slid her phone back into her pocket as she flushed the toilet and ran the water for a few seconds in the sink to give the impression that she needed to go. She glanced at her reflection in the mirror before quietly saying aloud as she chuckled, "Please give me the strength to handle Santana and her attitude for the next few days. And please don't let her murder Jesse or I in our sleep."</p><hr/><p>Later that evening, after Jesse returned home from work and they opted to order takeout from a nearby Thai restaurant in order to provide Santana with a warm meal, Rachel brought Santana two pillows and a blanket for the night. It was nearing 11 pm and a sweet, springtime rain was bucketing down, tapping rhythmically on the rusted window pane. The apartment was eerily quiet except for the ticking of the wall clock in the kitchen, and a somber mood was blanketing the air. An empty takeout carton and an unopened pack of cigarettes sat on the coffee table. </p><p>"There won't be any smoking inside the apartment, Santana," Rachel announced as she walked through the room.</p><p>Rachel set the pillows and blanket on a nearby chair as she then glanced over at Santana who was curled up onto the couch, her face against the back of the cushion, softly crying to herself. She wasn't even trying to hide her sobs; she <em>couldn't</em> hide her sobs. Rachel noticed her shoulders heaving up and down and frowned to herself. She and Jesse had left Santana alone for the most part, but now Rachel felt like she needed to at try to get Santana to open up. It was unusual to see Santana so vulnerable and, as much as their friendship has struggled, her heart was aching for her.</p><p>"Santana," Rachel pleaded tenderly as she walked near her, reaching down to softly touch her shoulder. "How can I help you?"</p><p>Santana remained silent and didn't budge from her current position. She tried with no avail to prevent her shoulders from heaving up and down.</p><p>"Don't you think talking to someone might be of some comfort? I'm a really good listener, you know," Rachel continued.</p><p>"I'm really not in the mood," Santana fired back, her tone both rough and soft at the same time.</p><p>"No one is ever in the mood to talk about their problems."</p><p>"It won't help, Rachel. We will be fine. Britt just needs some time to cool off and come around," Santana offered through tender sobs. "Talking isn't really my thing anyway."</p><p>"You know that's not true. Keeping everything bottled up inside of you can be more harmful," Rachel insisted, taking a seat in a nearby chair. She crossed her legs and splayed her arms out against the length of the armrests. "Talk to me, Santana. Let me in a little. If this whole thing isn't as big of a deal as you say it is, why are you laying on <em>my</em> couch and crying?"</p><p>"Talking to someone is <em>what</em> got me into trouble."</p><p>"Oh," Rachel replied hesitantly. She continued with caution as she tried to steal more information from Santana, "So, Brittany got mad at you for talking to someone? That sounds kind of odd."</p><p>"It's fucking ridiculous, isn't it?" Santana fired back, swinging her body against the couch as she sat up and threw her feet against the floor. "She wouldn't even let me explain anything to her. Her mind went straight to the worst possible scenario and accepted it as some kind of omen! I know she's hormonal and all because she's pregnant, but that isn't a reason to be so fucking irrational."</p><p>"What?" Rachel asked, confused and intrigued, her eyebrows rising in curiosity. Who's pregnant?"</p><p>"Brittany's pregnant," Santana answered in a whisper, reaching down toward the coffee table and grabbing a tissue to blow her nose. Santana smiled and chuckled to herself as she looked up at Rachel who's mouth was slowing gaping open. "Yeah, a lot can happen when we don't talk for a few years, huh?"</p><p>"That's incredible news, Santana! I'm so happy for you both," Rachel offered, her hands now curling against her mouth in excitement. "How far along is she?"</p><p>"About 13 weeks," Santana replied, grabbing another tissue to dab at her eyes. "We are just now starting to tell people, so don't worry, you weren't left out or anything."</p><p>"Maybe you're right. Maybe Brittany is feeling incredibly overwhelmed right now and just needs some time for herself. Honestly, though, now is also the time that she needs you more than ever," Rachel said, attempting to offer Santana an obvious piece of advice. "Can I ask what exactly happened, though? What has upset her so badly?"</p><p>"So, about that cup of tea you offered me earlier?" Santana asked, smiling behind puffy eyes and a runny nose.</p><p>"The offer never left. I have any kind your crazy mind could ever imagine," Rachel beamed, standing from her chair, waiting for an answer.</p><p>"Chai latte?"</p><p>"That's Jesse's favorite," Rachel answered, smiling. "Be right back."</p><p>Santana shuffled in her seat, propped her elbows on her knees, and dropped her head in her hands as Rachel headed toward the kitchen. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad confiding in Rachel. That's part of the problem; Santana desperately needed a friend right now. People had come and gone during their short time in New York, it seemed no one really stuck around longer than a few months, and it always ended up being her and Brittany against the world.</p><p>They had neighbors, co-workers, and acquaintances, but friends seemed few and far between. Blaine and Kurt were their closest companions, but even they were bidding farewell to the Big Apple and would be heading back to the squeaky clean streets of Lima soon. So, here she was, sitting on Rachel's couch in all her glory. </p><p>Rachel returned several minutes later and placed a cup of steaming tea in front of Santana. She sat her own cup down next to hers and proceeded to take a seat on the couch, pulling a pillow out from behind her back and setting it in her lap before saying, "No sugar. If I remember correctly..." </p><p>"Right, no sugar. Thank you so much," Santana offered, smiling. </p><p>"It was just a tea bag. Not much to it."</p><p>"No, not for the tea. I mean, yes, for the tea, but also for being a friend and allowing me to stay here," Santana continued. "Look, I know we haven't been on the best of terms lately. I don't even remember the last time we spoke, but I can't deny that you've always had a door open for me. You've allowed me to come and go in your life as I please. Sometimes I slammed the door shut, but you always opened it back up, even if I never returned. And I'm very sorry for that, that I didn't really stick around much. That I didn't give you more."</p><p>"I wasn't a good friend to you either, Santana. We both had our bad moments. Well, maybe you a little more often than me," she chuckled. "But who cares. They say it's all water under the bridge, right?"</p><p>"Yeah, I'd really like that."</p><p>"And it was Memorial Day of last year."</p><p>"What?" Santana asked, confused, lifting her mug to her lips as she inhaled the sweet aroma.</p><p>"Memorial Day nearly two years ago. That's when we last spoke. I remember it like it was yesterday because it was the day that I lost one of my best friends."</p><hr/><p>Santana and Rachel sat quietly on the couch across from one another chatting casually for little over two hours. They filled each other in on what they've been up to in the last year, gossiped, albeit lovingly, about Kurt's hideous new haircut, and drank enough tea to impress the Queen of England. </p><p>"Okay, Santana, let's talk about the real issue here," Rachel requested, tilting her head to the side to examine Santana's face. "Just tell me what's going on."</p><p>Santana sighed, placed her nearly empty mug on the table in front of her, and sat firmly against the back of the couch. She pulled her legs up and tucked them underneath her as she began to fiddle with a loose thread on a blanket that was sprawled out between them. For some reason, she felt a little nervous. She hadn't even done anything wrong, she thought, but guilt washed over her like a bucket of rain.</p><p>"I've been meeting up with Dani behind Brittany's back. I mean, not <em>behind</em> her back. Jesus, that really does sound awful," Santana admitted, furrowing her brow at the admission of her own words. "I mean, I just never told her about it."</p><p>"Well, I defintely wouldn't have guessed that one," Rachel nodded, wiping at her brow. "Dani... of all people you could find in New York City."</p><p>"It's not even that big of a deal. We've just met a few times at a bar for some drinks," Santana admitted, taking a sip of her tea. "...and maybe a few more times at her apartment just to hang out and listen to some of her new music."</p><p>"Santana, this sounds completely suspect," Rachel argued against her. "I'm not sure how I'm supposed to be on your side."</p><p>"She's <em>just</em> a friend," Santana quickly retorted.</p><p>"So, if she's <em>just</em> a friend, why would you not tell Brittany? What’s the big deal? It sounds like you were asking for trouble. She's your wife. This isn't some high school game."</p><p>"I honestly don't know why I didn't say anything. Britt probably wouldn't have cared, you know how she is, but I just didn't. I thought Dani and I would hang out a few times and that would be that, and if not, then I <em>might</em> mention it. The right time never felt, you know, right."</p><p>"So, was hanging out with her filling some kind of void for you?" Rachel asked.</p><p>"What do you mean?" Santana asked, raising an eyebrow as she took another sip of her tea and emptied the mug.</p><p>"What was she doing for you that Brittany wasn't?"</p><p>"I don't know, Rachel. It's not even that deep. She was just a good distraction for me. Brittany has been so stressed out and irritable lately, and we've started arguing over stupid things, like why the sheets on the bed don't match the pillowcases or why there's always a few drops of dried toothpaste in the sink. It just became too much and I needed some time away where I could just relax after work and not feel so stressed. I mean, I know the pregnancy has been really hard on her. She's missed a lot of work already because of morning sickness. I swear I've never seen so much vomit come out of one person. But she's completely overreacting in this situation."</p><p>"I find that to be incredibly unfair of you, Santana. She is probably going through a lot of emotional and hormonal changes right now, and the last thing she needs is you going back her back to hang out with your ex-girlfriend because you find her unbearable," Rachel said, her face scrunching up in disappointment. "I can understand exactly why Brittany was so upset. How would you feel if she did that to you?"</p><p>"I didn't know it was so wrong to have a friend."</p><p>"Santana, listen to yourself. You're being completely ridiculous and I feel like this is so unlike you. It's not at all about having a friend. It's about you choosing to keep from your <em>wife</em> the fact that you've traded in time with her for an <em>ex-girlfriend</em>. Process what I'm saying here," Rachel continued. She paused and cocked her head to the side and looked at Santana in confusion before asking, "How in the world did she find out?"</p><p>"Yeah," Santana chuckled as she began rubbing her chin. "I think that's the part that stings the most. She found out directly from Dani."</p><p>Rachel's head jolted backwards in shock. </p><p>"She bumped into her at a cafe near her work," Santana continued. "Totally fucking random chance in the biggest city in America and it happened to me."</p><p>"I haven't spoken to Dani <em>once</em> since the two of you broke up. I had no idea she still lived in the area," Rachel admitted. "I'm also kind of surprised she is willing to have anything to do with you considering you broke up with her over the phone."</p><p>"She moved to Nashville for about two years trying to dig her heels into the country music scene, but came back after she realized the city is far too small for her and she was bored," Santana added. "So, she's been living with Elliot and his boyfriend. She seems pretty chill now. We talked through a lot of shit and kind of put the past in its place."</p><p>"She's living with Starchild?" Rachel barked, scoffing loudly. </p><p>"Yeah, that’s crazy, huh?"</p><p>"Wow, <em>those</em> are some memories," Rachel said, nodding her head. A brief silence fell over them as Santana sighed heavily and zoned out in her thoughts. Rachel snapped her out of her tranced and asked, "So, what are you going to do?"</p><p>"Hopefully ride the storm out and be back home in a few days. That’s the plan. I miss her so much already."</p><hr/><p>Santana was the first to wake up; it wasn't a typical Saturday morning in May in New York City and she felt that harshly as she tugged her blanket up against her chest as she shivered underneath. The birds weren't chirping outside and the sun was taking a day off allowing a chilly breeze to skirt through the apartment.</p><p>She desperately missed waking up with Brittany's warm body pressed tightly against her, and the way she would sleep cozily with her face nuzzled into the back of her neck. They often slept like an oversized pretzel; limbs tangled awkwardly together, but somehow somehow forming the most perfect shape. She wondered in this moment if Brittany was missing her a little, too. </p><p>The sound of the rain still beating heavily against the window at 7:45 am distracted her from being able to fall back to sleep. She rubbed her eyes and tried to adjust her eyes to the darkened light casting through the blinds as she reached for her black, rectangular-framed glasses, a look typically reserved only for her wife, and tugged them on the bridge of her nose.</p><p>She eagerly reached for her phone off of the nightstand above her head and quickly scanned the screen as it lit up. No new text. No missed phone call. No email. <em>Nothing. </em>Santana released a heavy sigh from her mouth and mouthed the word 'fuck' softly to herself. She put her phone on vibrate and tucked it into her front pocket.</p><p>She stood to her feet and quickly scurried to the bathroom, the hardwood flooring creaking loudly underneath her bare feet. She looked over her tired reflection in the mirror; her eyes still slight puffy and a bruising shade of pink. She turned the faucet on and splashed herself with a handful of cold water, trying in vain to shake the memory of yesterday from her brain. <em>What are you going to do?  </em>Rachel's words echoed in her head like a broken record as her forehead wrinkled in frustration. </p><p>A few minutes later she walked out into the kitchen to get as glass of water. She scanned the various and magnets and photos plastered all over Jesse and Rachel's refrigerator as she let the smooth liquid coat her dry and aching throat. She smiled genuinely when she saw a photo of herself, Brittany, Quinn, Jesse and Rachel from a Christmas party about three years ago at Quinn's apartment in the neighborhood of Tribeca in Manhattan. Brittany had it printed, mainly because the two of them looked smokin' hot and everyone else looked hungover in the worst way, and put in on their refrigerator at the following New Year Eve's Party. It has remained there since, untouched.</p><p>Her eyes were then reeled in by a small business card hanging lazily underneath a worn out Tinkerbell magnet. She pulled it down, scanned the details, and grinned to herself. <em>That might be a good place to start</em>, she thought.</p><p>She picked up her phone, glanced at the time on the screen, and quickly dialed the number on the card. It rang a few times before a female voice greeted her on the other end. Santana listed intently as she made her way back into the living room and quickly snatched her purse out of a chair. She walked back into the kitchen and placed her purse on the counter, fumbled through it to locate her wallet, and then made her request when the woman was finished speaking, "Good morning. I'd like to send two dozen red roses to someone. Preferably today, if possible."</p><p>"Saturday delivery <em>and</em> express delivery will incur a hefty add-on fee, ma'am," the woman replied sternly. "It's going to cost you a pretty little penny."</p><p>"I don't care what it costs. I'll pay any fees. I just need them to get there as soon as possible."</p>
  </div></div>
</body>
</html>